if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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