I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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