There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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