Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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