Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
