Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
