what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
