Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
