Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
