WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
