Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
