Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Randomize