she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
