I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
