Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
