In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize