It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize
