I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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