I puked a lego.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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