you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
