i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
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