i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I'm just crazy horny about you
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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