the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
