I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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