ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize