I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
