We're facebook friends in real life
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
