I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
