Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Me too!
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
