It's like God shit irony all over that family
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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