I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Green mimosas i think yes
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
