belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
