You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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