and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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