i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
