Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
