hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize