i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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