how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
