There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
