3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I wish you could order shots online.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
What drink are we having for lunch?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Randomize
