I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Acid is not a monday night drug
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
