i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
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