i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
