went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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