In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize