i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
