do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
