Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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