I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
