My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
