the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
